My feeling DO matter

My love life is absolutely a ROLLER COASTER , and I don't know what to do.
My instincts say to LEAVE. My heart says to STAY.
he will be leaving for a week, to stay with a family member. him & I suggested it, and hope that will be a smart move for our relationship. I suggested that he should be gone for 2 weeks, and he said 'okay'. I am not sure if both of us can handle that, since we're so 'attached' to one-another.

How I've been feeling during this month of November.....


Not receiving much affection, sad, tired, stressed, hurt, thinking if are we really going to have a future, never listened to (what I say goes in one ear, and goes right out the other ear), feel like our problems will never be resolved, wanting more in the relationship (better and better), angry, thinking violent thoughts in my head, I lose my temper often, feel like my point never gets across, not supported (I'm not referring to 'financially'... just in general), always doing something wrong (pointing fingers is SO HIGH-SCHOOL), wanting a better life, isolated, don’t communicate much with my friends, constantly thinking about the future, Loss of interest in normal daily activities, impaired thinking or concentration, changes in my weight, easily annoyed, fatigue, low self esteem, excessive or inappropriate feelings of guilt, trouble making decisions, low appetite, sleeping too much, feel of worthlessness, rejected, feel like he is my worst enemy, I can’t let go (although I’m tolerating all the mistreatment), he doesn’t show any sympathy, insecure, sometimes I feel that I cannot control myself, feel that our problems will never get better, afraid that we will continue to hurt one another (physically and mentally), I wish he was the same person I met at first (but ever since we moved in together, I feel that my life is going downhill), I feel that him being nice to me is ‘Fake’, I feel like I can do a lot better (but I don’t want to break up), I feel like sex is a band aid in our relationship, I may have a smile on my face... but My heart isn't smiling at all, I feel like going back on Zoloft (although it really didn't do much... it sure makes Me gain weight).

We even turned to relationship-counseling. But what we really need is to take Anger-Management classes. I must admit, I could be a bitch... I could be stubborn... If I don't get My way, steam will be shooting out of My ears. I've had an ex-boyfriend similar to My current one (My ex and I dated for 2 years, and he was much worse). After dating that jerk-off, I told Myself that I would NEVER EVER date another man similar to My ex. I hate comparing both of them, but there are a lot of similarities.

What are your thoughts on Relationship Counseling?
What was the outcome?
What do you do, when you are feeling symptoms of Depression?

2008 Calendar

Get your 2008 Fetish Calendar TODAY !


http://www.lulu.com/content/1166991

Happy Spanksgiving

HOPE EVERYONE HAS A HAPPY & FESTIVE SPANKSGIVING !

Pic / Clip of the Day - Nov 20th

CLICK OF THE DAY...
"TICKLE TORTURE"



PIC OF THE DAY..

Baroness, Me, Dante & slave in Montreal Canada.
During Fetish Weekend

(Click 2 enlargen)



Much More worldwide party pics are in My Members area. Click on Me, to lead you to My Exxxclusive site:

Clip / Pic of the Day - Wednesday

Clip of the day...
"tom gets smothered by My FEET"



Get the full clip in My store (copy n paste to your browser):
http://clips4sale.com/studio/14487


Pic of the Day

3 Amigas (helena, jaye & sin @ Our Mansion Party, on Nov 2nd in Chicago).
Numerous spankings administered by Myself

(CLICK TO ENLARGEN)



Is YOUR birthday coming up?
Would you care for a Spanking of Y/your LIFE ?
Then join U/us on Nov 17th @ the Continuum.
MORE INFO: BONDAGENIGHTCHICAGO.COM

XoXo,
*MX

Pic/Clip of the day

Ready for a dessert after dinner? Then HERE IT IS ...




Pic of the day..

Halloween 2007
(click to enlargen)




MORE pics & vid clips are on My sites:

MORE clips just added

CLIPS JUST ADDED...

"LOLLIPOP LICKING", "HUMILIATION (SMALL COCK HUMILIATION, THAT IS)", and "HIGH HEEL WORSHIP".


CLICK ON THIS BANNER TO LEAD YOU TO MY CLIPS4SALE STORE(MANY MORE 2 CUM):







Xoxo,
*MX

November 2007 Web Updates

*DIFFERENT FETISHES GALLERY*. - These particular Fetish Photos will be published in My New Book. 112 Images of 112 different Fetishes.- 112 Images - 11/2007 - Photos by Various Photographers.



*PERFORMANCE IMAGES*- PERFORMANCE photos @ the Naughty Playground Fetish Party in Chicago, IL.Guest Performers: Mara Mars & Miss Natasha - 30 Images - 10/2007 - Photos by Fernando Castel



*PERFORMANCE IMAGES*- PERFORMANCE photos @ Excalibur's in Chicago, IL. This show was for GothicFest. Guest Performer: Miss Aria - 34 Images - 10/2007 - Photos by Keith Bishton



*Guest Model, Sarah Monster*. - Teacher Xena notices that her student has been failing her classes. She bounds Her to the cross, tortures her 'private parts' and smothers her (all for her punishment). Sarah begs to be released, but it won't happen!.- 38 Images - 10/2007 - Photos by Ed Emering.



*Guest Model, Sarah Monster*. - This little girl deserves the treatment of her life. Clothespins, Bondage, Boot Worship & Smothering in this gallery!.- 38 Images - 10/2007 - Photos by Ed Emering.



*Guest Model, Sarah Monster*. - This thief became a little frisky with Officer Xena. Xena has to conduct a little Cavity Search & then sends this one to JAIL! - 29 Images - 11/2007 - Photos by Ed Emering.



Credits:

Mara Mars @ http://MaraMars.Org
Miss Natasha @ http://myspace.com/mistressnatasha
Sarah Monster @ http://www.myspace.com/sarahmonster83
Miss Aria @ http://www.myspace.com/imyourgodaria
Fernando Castel @ http://nocturnaldominion.com
Keith Bishton @ http://www.myspace.com/engravedcell
Ed Emering @ http://www.onemodelplace.com/photographer_list.cfm?P_ID=2127


- Want to see Past Updates & Take a General Tour of the Huge site?
Then click on Me...



- Joining the Members Area........

Further instructions are on the 'JOIN' page
LISTED HERE!

7) Some of My DVD's are on SALE ! Go HERE & VISIT MY STORE!.

8) I have a storefront where you can purchase a 2008 Calendar and My Art Books. Click HERE to Visit My Store Front.

9) I've set up a new way for you to send Me Donations.
Click this Banner and send your donations to My Email Addy: mistressxena_chicago@yahoo.com



10) Next Fetish Party : NOV 17th @ The Continuum. MORE INFO @ BondageNightChicago.Com.

Photo of the Day - Thursday

No, the BOOBIES are hiding.

Title: INHALE, EXHALE, INHALE......INHALE....

Who: Miss Sarah Monster & Myself

By: Ed Emering (found Right Here on Myspace).

When: Oct 2007

Where: The Studio

MORE Girl/Girl action is found here: