Saturday, August 28, 2010

*NEW* clips added for the week of Aug 22nd

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Nuit Des Libertines Presents: Transformation: Sept 3rd: Chicago


 


NUIT DES LIBERTINES PRESENTS: TRANSFORMATION!
At the Studio - Chicago


Boys being transformed into sissy sluts, drag queens, baby girls, and gothic whores by the Fabulous Hostesses.
Date: Friday, September 3rd 2010.
10pm-3am
Your hosts:
Lady Maria, Mistress Clawdia, & Mistress Xena
Bring your own 'girly' attire (this means, wigs, dresses, high heels, lingerie, stockings, makeup, etc).
We will have a limited amount of clothes/makeup/wigs for the guests. But not enough for everyone. So, make sure you bring your own. Street clothes are unacceptable. You wear street clothes? You get naked for us. If you're not comfortable with getting naked, then bring a thong. If you don't have any Feminine clothing, then go the Thrift Store. Or Macy's. For makeup, buy Wet N Wild at Walgreens. We'll make you into the whore you really are!
Demo's will be happening all night.
$20 admission.
BYOB.
21+.
Bring your own toys.
No Cameras.
You may park behind the dungeon space (for free). If all of the spaces are occupied, then park on the street.
Safe dungeon rules will be enforced.
RSVP : nuitdeslibertines at yahoo.com
(you must RSVP by the afternoon of Sept 3rd, or before. Any RSVP's after will not be accepted).
RSVP with your full name. The location will be revealed, once we receive your RSVP.
Website (partially commplete): http://www.libertineschicago.com The Studio: http://thestudiochicago.com


~Indulge your fantasies~

Friday, August 20, 2010

New Clips Added for the week of Aug 15th

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

1st day serving Mistress Xena

Written by 'sarahslut', slut in training:
8-2-10   

    Thursday was the first time i was allowed to serve Mistress Xena. By the way, i LOVE the name Xena! It harkens back to a time when i used to watch the show Xena: Warrior Princess. i never knew why i liked the show so much, but i think i now understand. The show centered around a tough, powerful lead female character who would routinely battle and beat up mostly male characters. i guess even at that age i showed an attraction to women who were not only beautiful but also had strong, dominant personalities. It certainly carried over into adulthood. Watching The Devil’s Rejects with Baby Firefly or Natural Born Killers with Mallory Knox drives me absolutely wild with passion! They could tie me up any day and have their sadistic way with me. J My favorite scene from The Devil’s Rejects involves Baby Firefly and two female hostages held up in a hotel room. One has to use to the bathroom and asks for permission to go. Baby cruelly replies she may relieve herself only if she hits her friend. i of course find this scene to be erotic since pee play and bathroom control fascinate me. Although i have never drank a Domme’s piss before, i desperately want to be given the privilege of experiencing it. My favorite type of Piss Play porn involves the sub being forced by a Domme(s) to drink piss. He is verbally humiliated for having to drink piss, and is either forced to watch them slowly urinate into something like a glass or dog dish, or used as a human toilet seat. Just being peed on does not arouse me as much, but it is certainly just as humiliating. i also enjoy just watching girls pee in non-BDSM videos, preferably either their panties or pants.

    Anyways, sorry to get off on the whole Xena tangent. i have been meaning to ask if Xena is Her real name, or just used in the BDSM scene. So we met the week before at a cafĂ© just a couple of blocks away from where She lives. We had a very nice conversation that lasted about two hours. We got along very well, and shared many similar interests that were not just related to kink. i was able to just be myself, and felt like i didn’t have to put on a mask to fit some mold i was expected to emulate. i also allowed myself to be vulnerable. i can’t remember the last time i was so open with someone i had just met regarding such personal issues. i guess i felt a real connection with Her that allowed me to relax. The same is true of last Thursday. i didn’t take myself too seriously and laughed and had an overall AMAZING time. J

    It began with me showing Mistress Xena a sample of the collection of female clothes and toys I have collected. i brought along three pairs of panties: pink, silky boy shorts with white lace around the edges and a blue ribbon adorning the front, a black, frilly g-string with a bow attached to the back and faux jewelry on the front, and a red thong, along with a blue dress purchased from Victorias Secret, a blond wig, pink 5” high heels, fake breasts, a two-sided bra, some makeup, a black ball gag, a 6” butt plug, a baby bottle, and baby pacifier. She chose for me to wear the bra and the red thong with one of Her black dresses with a red floral pattern over the undergarments. i really liked how the dress looked on me. Black dresses are my favorite type, and i really need to purchase one myself! J i have to admit the thong was the least comfortable choice since it offers the least coverage and exposes most of my pubic region and bottom. Nudity is something that causes me embarrassment, especially when told to undress in front of a female. It is incredibly powerful and erotic in a BDSM scene, and i do enjoy that mix of excitement and humiliation. But there is also this lack of confidence in my body, which causes me distress. i think the problem relates to my self-image and my sometimes negative view of it.

    However, since it pleased Mistress Xena then i was happy. She apparently enjoyed having my bottom exposed, since She smacked my bare cheeks while i was serving as Her footstool. It came as a pleasant surprise while relaxing on the floor, Her feet propped up on my back. i had long entered subspace by this point, and began to retreat inside myself into a deep introspection. The slap from the wig brush certainly snapped me back into an extroverted state. Using my own brush to inflict pain also opened my eyes to the limitless possibilities that household objects hold as punishment toys. i had no idea a brush that size could sting so bad!

    The spanking started off slowly, with gentle smacks that provided pleasurable sensations. The intervals between each blow were varied enough so that no actual pain was experienced. i was quite aroused, and moaned heavily from the immense pleasure received from each smack She was giving me. i loved begging Her for more, as She controlled how much enjoyment or pain i would receive, and how i had NO CONTROL, lying at Her feet, completely at the mercy of Her will. i quickly thought to myself, “This doesn’t hurt at all, it is purely enjoyment. People in BDSM movies are just acting that it hurts.” However, this pleasure soon turned to discomfort as She intensified the force and ramped up the time in-between each smack. It quickly morphed into all out pain, where my playful begging and moaning transformed into genuine yelping. my ass was stinging from each repeated blow, and my body was writhing in agony, wondering when it would all stop. At one point She asked me if i wanted Mercy, the safe word to stop all play. Sure, i could have ended it but there was NO WAY IN HELL i was going to walk away from my first erotic spanking, no matter how much it hurt. i also wanted to push myself and see how far She could take me into subspace. By the time She stopped spanking me, my ass was bright red and sore. But i didn’t really feel it as my body’s endorphins were rushing through my veins! It was similar to the feeling of when i got tattooed, only this was MUCH more intense. i can now honestly say there is a BIG difference between spanking for reward and spanking for punishment. As a reward, the spanking doesn’t really hurt and is more sensual and playful. Sure, it is fun to beg and plead to stop to enhance the scene, but the sub doesn’t actually want it to stop. However, spanking done as a form of punishment is a different story. This type isn’t meant to be enjoyable, and is used as a form of discipline when the sub has been bad or if the Domme is just feeling cruel. It can feel anywhere from slight discomfort to stinging pain. While i obviously enjoyed the reward more, i didn’t hate the punishment. Sure, it really, REALLY hurt in the moment, but i enjoyed squirming on the floor, with my legs flailing in the air, knowing that She was enjoying watching my predicament. Also, in a way the pain felt good. It felt like all my inner pain that had built up was brought to the surface and released with each smack. It was very therapeutic, like a cleansing of the body.

    i always found spankings to be very erotic, and i can now definitely say i LOVE them! My favorite style to watch is over the knee, or OTK, spankings. It is very sensual since the bottom is over the top’s knee, and can also be very humiliating depending on how exposed they are. My fantasy involves being grabbed by a Mistress and forcefully pulled over her knee for being bad. i would be dressed in a very feminine dress with plenty of lace and ribbons, perhaps a French Maid’s outfit, and either panties or a diaper underneath. She would hike up my skirt and begin to slowly swat my bottom, first over the undergarments before eventually pulling them down to my knees. The smacks would intensify, and i would squirm trying to break free but to no avail.  There would be plenty of verbal humiliation involved, regarding how much of a sissy i am for letting a girl spank me and being too weak to break free from her grips. Ideally, she would be stronger than me to actually hold me down, but i could also just pretend to be unable to escape. Also, while lying across her knee she would notice me becoming aroused from my cock rubbing against her leg. She would of course laugh at my tiny clitty becoming hard from the spanking, and intensify the spanking until my ass turned bright red. After, she would pull my panties back up and either tell me to return to my domestic duties or have me stand in the corner to think about my behavior.

    Speaking of corner time, it is something i am interested in engaging in. To me, the worst possible punishment is being made to spend time away from the person you long to please. When in the corner, you are by yourself and forced to reflect on your misbehavior. Of course, fun variations can be implemented to make it more tedious and/or humiliating depending on the infraction and the Domme’s mood. Panties pulled down to the ankles, standing with a full bladder while you constantly hear water drip, or counting to a certain number are just a few of the MANY devious ideas that come to my mind. J

    Having my balls slapped with the brush was an all-together different but equally painful experience. Although it wasn’t that hard, it produced a sharp pain in my stomach and left my squirming. i was more frightened of that then the stinging slaps. i even closed my legs at one point to try to prevent any further sharp slaps. However, Mistress immediately told me to spread them and i obeyed. i trusted She wouldn’t take me too far over my edge, and the idea of mercilessly being slapped and the pain that would follow both excited and frightened me. CBT was one of the earliest genres of BDSM porn i watched, and is still one of my favorites. i don’t know why, but i love seeing a guy get kicked in the nuts. When i was young, i used to watch WWF and my favorite matches involved female vs. male competitors. i would secretly hope the women would come out victorious and cheap shot the men in their balls. All of my friends said Chyna was ugly and looked like a man, but i viewed her as the epitome of female power. She possessed physical strength, and the fact that she could legitimately beat up the men turned me on. My favorite type of CBT to watch involves a girl or multiple girls kicking a man in the nuts. i want to eventually experience this sensation, even though i know it will HURT! i was never hit in the nuts as a child either by friends joking around or from an accident playing around. Most guys have at least experienced once in their lifetime the feeling of being hit in the balls. It might sound strange, but i have ALWAYS secretly wished someone would hit me there.

    i used to think i was abnormal for wanting this, like why am i WANTING to be hit there when every other guy cowers at the mere thought of the pain involved? i was convinced something was wrong with me, and no one else shared in these desires. Watching porn associated with it, it seemed like the men did not really want this and were being forced by these women to experience great pain. However, as i moved past just watching and reading BDSM fiction and learning about the actual practice, i discovered it was all play. These men actually LIKED getting hit in the balls, much like i wanted to experience. Yet, i could still not move past the guilt. It was like, okay so other people share my feelings, but it still is not okay. i now know it was my inability to accept myself and not the type of play that was wrong, as long as it is between two or more consenting adults who know what they are doing and take the necessary precautions so no one REALLY gets hurt. This is also why i believe the last Mistress i was serving did not work out. i was just too new to the scene and unsure of myself and my needs. Instead of being completely honest about my desires, i kept them locked inside and hid them for fear of judgment. This really limited me in my ability to please her and have fun while in her presence.

    Since i have been attending local BDSM munches and play parties, i have begun to open up more. i also have been doing some serious soul searching, finding out exactly what it is i want in a relationship. As i said in an email to Mistress Xena, some of my fetishes still cause me guilt and i haven’t been able to fully accept them. These include the more taboo ones, mainly AB/DL, Piss Play, Human Toilet (for piss only), CBT, Small Penis Humiliation, and cuckolding. The cuckolding causes me distress because on the one hand i do want a partner to fuck other men to humiliate me and display who is the dominant one in the relationship, but on the other i feel like it would be degrading and cause a great deal of jealousy in the relationship. i also really worry that if we tried this and i didn’t enjoy it, would i be able to continue loving this person who fucked someone besides me even though i agreed to it? But i am working diligently on this through talking with other kinksters and allowing myself to accept ALL of my desires. The most important areas i need improvement on are self-confidence, self-acceptance, and self-love. Once i allow myself to fully accept my entire being and love every part, even the ones that cause guilt and i perceive to be wrong, then others will be able to do the same.

    i have always been rather quiet and unsure of myself around others, especially in larger groups. This severely limited me in forming friendships, and romantic relationships were altogether absent. Perhaps part of the dating problem was i knew at a very early age i was different from most boys and had all these fetishistic desires. i didn’t want to just go to the movies with a girl and cuddle and make out at the end of the night. I would rather have her force me to wear woman’s clothing and be her sissy bitch, getting fucked in the ass with her strap-on. That’s not to say we couldn’t enjoy doing vanilla activities. But i could never be truly happy in a relationship with a girl that was purely vanilla. i could compromise where we just scene sometimes, or limit it to strictly sexual play, but the 24/7 Mistress/slave relationship is my ideal.

    Regarding partners, i have begun to toss around the idea of playing with a male, perhaps even including sexual play. It would have to be a femme boy who is very girly and shares a similar interest in cross-dressing. i am not sure how far i would want to take this, just cuddling and kissing or full-on rough sex? Obviously this has caused me a great deal of questioning as to why i am having these fantasies and if i am in fact bi-sexual? That just sounds weird for me to even consider. Homosexual behavior is something that has always been condemned in my family, especially with my Dad. My Aunt is the only very open one, and even then the way she has asked me if i was gay upon my telling her i cross-dress leads me to speculate how tolerant she would truly be. i don’t want to repress my feelings but at the same time i feel like i would somehow be shaming them if i did ANYTHING with a male. i do find androgynous men to be attractive, but i won’t even allow myself to look at or watch porn associated with cross-dressing or shemales. However, regarding BDSM play with males, i could NEVER submit to a male. i only find serving women to be gratifying. That is not to say i wouldn’t respect a lover/boyfriend of a Domme or partner i was serving. That would be pleasing her so i would be happy. But not if it was solely to a Master. And i would never want a partnership with a man. i would only consider casual play with a male.

    In that moment of submission, fantasy and reality blend into one, truly becoming “real” for me. i am no longer my male self but am transformed into a highly submissive sissy girl where all my guilt melts away and who longs to please a Domme’s every command. i currently have the name of sarah slut by Mistress Xena who is currently training me as Her slave. J i already had the first name given to me by a previous Mistress, and i LOVE the surname. i am quite reserved sexually in my vanilla identity, but when my kinky self awakens, few limits exist! i can be as dirty and naughty as i want, without hesitating to think about what others would think of me. i would say i am most free when i am serving. All of my real-world worries disappear and my sole drive is to please. The feeling of pleasing a woman who deserves and commands my submission is unlike any other. It fills me with this level of satisfaction that nothing else can compare to. At my very core is this longing to please, and i view my submission as a gift.

    i don’t think of submitting as being weak, but rather a demonstration of my inner strength that is reserved mostly for the people i care deeply for. i love to please people but this can sometimes drive me to be too submissive to the point i discredit my own needs and feelings. i have a real problem being assertive, and this can obviously lead to  people taking advantage of me. However, when i am serving someone i feel a greater sense of self-confidence and self-esteem which allows me to not feel the need to be so submissive in my vanilla life. In fact, i HATE submitting outside of the BDSM lifestyle except to people i really love. In short, submission engenders a sense of personal pride and power for me.

-sarah slut

Saturday, August 14, 2010

BondageNightChicago dungeon party -Aug 21st - RSVP

NEXT PARTY: SATURDAY, AUGUST 21, 2010

http://bondagenightchicago.com/augflyer.jpg

Thursday, August 12, 2010

*NEW* clips added - The Week of Aug 8th

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

What's going on - Aug 2010

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.