The Life of Mistress Xena: Stuff of the Day

Quote of the Day

"HAPPY HUMP-DAY, FUCKERS !"

Q & A's of the Day

Should I Tell My Partner I Have a Fetish?
Yes and no. Blurting out "I get off on hairy women" on a first date with someone you barely know probably isn't a good idea. However, if you're beginning what might be a long-term relationship and your fetish plays an important role in your sexual life, you should consider coming clean.

"Sexual compatibility is key to every joyous union," says Gloria Brame, author of the new book Come Hither: A Commonsense Guide to Kinky Sex (Simon and Schuster, 2000). "You should try to find out, right up front, if you share the same sexual values. Do this before either of you make commitments and definitely before you fall in love," she adds.

What If He or She Freaks Out When I Reveal My Fetish?
There are several scenarios here. What if your partner gets hysterical or overreacts when you mention your thing for rubber outfits? "That's a clue that he or she may have some sexual hang-ups," says Brame. In this case, you'll want to ditch either the rubber or your lover.

What if your partner simply doesn't share your passion for platform shoes, but isn't repulsed by it, either? "You can't force the issue," says Brame. "You have to figure out how important that fetish is in your life."

Can a Fetish Be Unhealthy?
Even masturbation can be unsafe or unhealthy. There's nothing wrong with workin' the gherkin, but a guy who sticks his penis into a vacuum cleaner is asking for trouble. The same is true of fetishes: it's not what you do, but how you do it that makes it unsafe. If your fetish becomes more important than your partner (you could care less who your partner is, as long as he or she is fulfilling the fetish), you may have a problem.

"The same safe, sane, and consensual credo of the organized S&M community applies to fetishists. The activity should be physically and emotionally safe, you shouldn't be taking any crazy risks, and both partners must be of consenting age, mentally capable of giving consent and know what they're consenting to."

Music of the Day

Yellow Magic Orchestra - Nice Age (live)